Why Elsa Marie Collins Starts Every Day With Her Morning ‘Non-negotiable’

What does success look like for me, a mother of three multiracial, multicultural, and multilingual children, plus a husband who lives part-time in a different state? How does it manifest for a woman like myself, one who runs her own charitable organization and a consulting company, on top of simply trying to be a functioning member of society? If I told you all of it hinges upon 20 minutes on the treadmill, you might not believe me. But those precious 20 minutes of exercise each morning give me purpose and keep me focused. Frankly, it is a way to motivate me to help others.

My workout is about more than movement—it’s about setting up my day for success. I would wake up every morning with the idea that the treadmill was the most important priority of the day—not because it actually was, but because if I didn’t give it this level of importance, it would be very easy for me to do [insert any activity that society deems is important for women/mothers]. So I treated my morning workout like an absolute must. And before long, the routine became the thing giving my day structure and meaning. 

I call these 20 minutes my non-negotiable. After my alarm goes off, I head downstairs to the kitchen to prepare lunch for my youngest child and start to get breakfast ready for the family.  I then head to my treadmill for 20 minutes to get my sanity. I get on the treadmill to ideate around projects. I walk on the treadmill to ruminate on the day ahead and get ready to tackle all of the items that are on my calendar and my to-do list. Once I get this movement in, I can finish making breakfast, do school drop-off, and then start my work day.

But what if I have an early flight? A service trip to the border? A visit to a battleground state to help my community get out and vote? Do I still get my non-negotiable in? Yes, I do. I have set my alarm at 4 AM to ensure I have those 20 minutes, because as tired as I am when I get out of bed, I know I will feel worse if I don’t do it at all. This simple act rids me of anxiety and generally makes me feel like I can handle anything that comes my way. That’s a powerful 20 minutes!

The first time I ever heard the phrase “mom guilt” was a couple of weeks after having my first child. I was trying to figure out when I was going to be able to work out between feedings, taking showers, and getting back to work. Then someone said to me, “but won’t you feel guilty that you are working out instead of doing [insert any activity that society attributes to women/mothers]?” I remember this moment clearly—and I also recall deciding, then and there, that I wouldn’t. I knew I would be a better mother, worker, and human being if I did this one activity for myself. As a result, I unsubscribed from mom guilt (and from peer pressure, too!). No one is living your life in your shoes, so why let their opinions affect you?

Introducing: Facial of the Moment

You know the value of an excellent facial when it doesn’t just deliver glowing skin for 24 hours—it provides radiance for days and days after your appointment. In this new section, Facial of the Moment, I’ll spotlight top aestheticians whose facials stand out not only for their immediate effects, but also for their lasting benefits. This is a fresh, honest, and tapped-in take you won’t find anywhere else. I want to offer a behind-the-scenes look at industry leaders and their unique skin philosophies, specialties, and techniques, so my goal is to be transparent and personable, providing you with real reviews so you can make informed choices about where to invest in your skincare. Whether a facial costs $200 or $1400, I’m here to ensure you get the best bang for your buck. Expect witty and insightful commentary, all while keeping your best interests at heart.

Shu Uemura’s Hair Mask Brings Life to Damaged Locks

Achieving an effortless hair look can seem like a pipe dream—at least, in my experience. When I was younger, I watched countless commercials for hair products that featured women tossing their shining, flaxen locks into the camera. And I believed that beautiful hair could be very easily attained, using the right products. But reality hit hard when I grew up and realized those women had a team preparing, drying, and volumizing their hair behind the scenes (thank you, Finesse and Flex). That said, if your haircare routine involves color treatments, highlights, blowouts, and very hot styling tools, you know it takes a lot of work for your hair to look good. You also know how crucial it is to use top-quality hair products to maintain silky, soft, and, more importantly, healthy hair. I’ve always prioritized shiny and manageable hair, but a few years ago, I began noticing that my once silky mane felt as coarse as a kitchen broom. It was perplexing: I always used the best products, rich with protein—a component I thought was beneficial for my hair.  My colorist identified the issue: I was using too many protein-rich products. He recommended switching to more hydrating options and reducing the bond-builders that were once so popular.

He introduced me to two of Shu Uemura's hair masks. One was a hydrating mask for regular use, and the other was a weekly treatment called the Ultimate Reset Hair Mask. This product not only hydrates, it also repairs, thanks to its key ingredient: rice extract sourced from Japan. After the first application, my hair felt revitalized, like it had received an injection of hydration. I apply this mask once a week, leaving it on for just five minutes (though you can leave it longer for even better-looking locks). Despite the $73 price tag per jar—which may seem steep—is about the cost of a single blowout. Prioritizing healthy hair over frequent blowouts is a clear choice for me, and the Shu Uemura Ultimate Reset Hair Mask has become an essential part of my hair routine. Lastly, a personal tip: rotate your hair products every few months to prevent your strands from becoming too accustomed to one product.